It what appeared to be a very real problem between my very good friend and myself to distinguish what she termed "real emergencies" and those that threatened my social life, I devised a system mirroring that adopted by national security organizations. For example, "there is a guy at this bar that I hooked up with at a wedding and now I'm freaking out" is not the same sort of emergency as "I'm at the top of a canyon and my car has overheated."
Something along the lines of "We're not on the list of this club," not an emergency, I get that now.
Hence the new system: CODE PINK.
If things have escalated and say my hair lady quit on me on the day of my appointment and we also can't get on the list for this club: CODE FUSCHIA. I repeat, CODE FUSCHIA. From that point, there is only one way to go. You must go dark, undercover. It's an emergency which you may never return from. Say goodbye to all you've known. We have a CODE BRUNETTE.
CODE BRUNETTE.
To be used only in the most serious crisis'.
Our new system has eliminated any misunderstandings in what she deems "real emergencies." But I think she took off-ense to whole brunette jab.
Oh well, can't please em all.
