An open letter to Miss Paris Hilton

just for the purposes of my own understanding, and i'm the product of a decade and a half of a los angeles public school education, so bare with me, let me get this straight. paris, you got busted for a dui. totally a bummer. here is what i'm stuck on. per your statements - it's ok if you drive erratically, if only on your way to get a hamburger. and you were super tired but not enough so to not go grab dinner and a night of partying with your girlfriends. and you were legally intoxicated per a field sobriety test but that's only because alcohol affects you faster because you're tall and skinny. and lastly you think it's totally unfair, no wait, it hurts your feelings, that people blow this stuff out of proportion, probably much of the same way hearing that pos song a producer manufactured in a studio everytime i turn on fm radio hurts my ears. so i empathize. hurts your feelings, hurts my ears. listen, duis blow. i get it. but how about just taking responsibility instead of forcing an american audience with little patience for you already to have to endure days, potentially weeks, of this lame spin control. you drank too much, you shouldn't have been driving, and you got caught. life's a bitch. deal.